Thursday, August 19, 2004

Six weeks of nausea?

No, I'm not pregnant. That would mean more like 3 months of nausea.

But, I think I'm going to throw up. This came in the mail today:

It says "Thank you for your participation in the Master Knitting Program of The Knitting Guild Association. We have received your submission and have sent it to the committee for evaluation."

Every time I think about the fact that I sent off my Level I binder, I feel a little sick. Usually I'm one of the most able knitters around, mostly because I have been doing it for a long time, and there aren't a lot of knitters around. So I don't get a lot of criticism. Whatever I do is good enough; it's certainly better than anyone who can't knit at all can do. This is new; this is different. And I'm afraid they're going to pick it apart for little things that don't have anything to do with knitting, like my references or something. I'm sure I did all the swatches right; I'm afraid they'll make me re-do them because I blocked them pretty flat, which some people don't like. But I should calm down, and know that they'll have some constructive criticism to help me be a better knitter. What a load of crap. I don't believe a word of it. I'm a plenty good knitter, and I don't need to improve anything I did for Level I. Well, my real attitude is somewhere between those two extremes. When that box arrives at my door returning it to me, I'm going to have to go throw up before I open it.

But why is it such a big deal?

Last night at the Meetup we discussed tattoos. Here's what my next one might look like:
The picture is of a decal in a plastic sleeve; sorry about the photo quality. Cool, huh?


Anonymous said...

Try to think of it as being in a classroom. Except you get another chance to get 100% instead of just one. All they are going to do (at worst) is tell you to redo a swatch or something and then you redo it the way they want and then presto/chango, it's perfect. I understand wanting it to be perfect the first time but since you've already sent it away, might as well start breathing again. haha


Beth said...

Yes, I know. But in my mind it is perfect. The only reason for re-doing something is if I blocked it too hard, which was a choice I made for a reason, and it won't teach me anything. I know I did everything correctly, there won't be any swatches that are wrong. There's one swatch where the ribbing tension might look a little wonky, but I didn't do anything differently than I always do, so I couldn't correct it. But that's my over-critical mind. It's probably fine. My biggest fear is not that I did anything wrong, but that I will be required to re-do something that will be a waste of time for me. Judges like to say that it's all to help us be better knitters, but then they turn around and tell us how picky they are about every little thing. I've even worried that putting a piece of paper in every sleeve, to help it be more stable, will be a problem, because it didn't say to do that in the instructions. Isn't that stupid? It's just my over-active imagination. Nothing to get excited over, and it's just the moments when I remember that it's gone that I feel a little funny. I'm not really going to throw up, I was just going for a little humor.