My Ego Can't Take This -or- I AM The Technical Advisor!...I..um, was...oh dear...

Today my ego has been on a roller coaster. And this isn't good. It's a big ego. It might get motion sickness, and then what?

Firstly, I am still on a high from the new attention to my humble little blog derived from Bonne Marie's kudos on my grafting work. I just think I'm the shit because "I'm on ChicKnits" and "I can graft" and "I make beautiful sweaters!" Speaking of beautiful sweaters, A better, non-boob-inflating picture:

See, you'd have a big ego too, being so talented and beautiful, and smart, which you can't tell from the picture, but I am!

But then:
On my doorstep today:
My TKGA Master Knitter submission.

As Beethoven once wrote, "Dum-dum-dum duuuum". And then he wrote "Dum-dum-dum duuuum", again but a step lower.

I immediately called Teri, who just moved to Kansas City and doesn't have a job yet, so I knew she'd be home. She "held my hand" as I opened the package to find out that I am the most perfect knitter they've ever seen. Wait, no, that was a dream I had where I was talented and beautiful, and smart, too. This is real life, and while I can take an inch out of the MIDDLE of a sleeve, apparently I can't weave in some ends. What? I'm dumb. I also made another stupid mistake, which I'm not going to dignify with the time it would take me to describe it. However, one of the swatches they described as needing to be re-done was clearly not MINE, and I'm sending it back without re-knitting it. They said I put the tag on the wrong corner (it's on the upper left, just like every other swatch in the whole thing!?!?) and I cast on the wrong number of stitches (I count 30, not 25, just like it's supposed to be) and they said I had twisted stitches? Not. I have been knitting so long that's practically impossible. My knitting is a habit, so every stitch is the same. I'd have to concentrate to twist one. I think there was just a "cut & paste" error. I was my diplomatic self, though, and explained that I counted 30, etc., and would you please give me more details about what is wrong, like a thread through the twisted stitches so that I can see which ones. I've already re-knit what I needed to. It's in an envelope ready for me to take to the post office.

I'm just so mad at myself. How stupid. I was so sure that I was the shit and could pass in one try. Just poke my ego with a pin and watch it pffftttt all over the room.

So back to the praise and adoration. Tomorrow is knitting at Barnes & Noble night, and I'm going to wear my new beautiful sweater, and no one will mention that I should have picked up the stitches on the sleeve for the collar differently. And neither will I, because I don't care enough to re-do it. After all the time I spent on the rest of the sweater, now I don't care. It's done, and it doesn't matter. Because I'm talented, and beautiful, and smart, and gosh darn it, people like me!